When a whole society weighs in as heavily as the Scots, a whole society solution is needed.
“Five portions of fruit and veg every day,” the dietician announced, “there is nothing more important to say about healthy living.”
And sure enough every question lobbed at the panel during a Food Standards Agency event ten years ago on Skye prompted the same response.
It certainly made an impression for a few days of frenzied salad-eating at least. But it’s easy to slip when your worst eating habits look a sight better than the Scots average.
There were no chips in our house because my dad had a heart attack when I was wee. He changed his diet overnight.
So long before skimmed milk appeared on supermarket shelves the thin, watery stuff sat in a special red jug in our fridge, boycotted by the rest of the family.
Likewise his polyunsaturated fat margarine, dry-looking wholemeal bread and stewed rhubarb with no sugar. Yuk.
But dad’s diet left its mark. I still don’t have fizzy drinks, chips, white bread or full fat milk. Dad often jogged to work I often cycle.
But as this week’s grim news showed, that’s not enough.
Shockingly, Scotland is just behind America in the obesity league table, kids of overweight mums are more likely to die before 55 and the number of massively overweight Scots has been underestimated for years.
Being a tee-total, chip-avoiding cyclist means I’m a veritable Amazon amongst 50-something Scotswomen. Yet in truly healthy, active societies I’m the Bridget Jones-shaped podgy gal.
Recently I spent three months in Norway. What an eye opener.
There everyone from the boss to the cleaner takes a packed lunch to eat together in a pleasant room with coffee and tea provided. No-one nips out for a sausage roll.
There are no kebab shops or fish and chip shops near big offices or schools. Delis, bakers and corner shops do exist. But nothing isolates the stranger faster than wasting money buying expensive, prepared food.
I tried eating a Mars Bar in a lunch-room full of rake-thin Norwegians tucking into beetroot and soft cheese with pepper on crispbread. I could hardly swallow. There was no easier way to be seen as a social incompetent unless it was using a taxi or a car. Oslo has one of Europe’s best public transport systems with a network of trams, buses, ferries, suburban and inter-city trains. So walking between stops and across town in all weathers is quite normal. Followed by a “proper” walk every weekend.
The truth is inescapable. Land in Norway is cheap and available, but alcohol and takeaway food is expensive.
Land in Scotland is expensive and unavailable, but alcohol and takeaway food is cheap.
So Norwegians generally have two homes (a city pad and a Broons-style country cabin for weekends) while the Scots generally have two spare tyres.
When a whole society weighs in as heavily as the Scots, a whole society solution is needed.
We could do a lot worse than taking lessons from Norway.
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