Eyes front as Bake Off gets in tents.
The first episode of The Great British Bake Off is like setting off on an extended coach holiday.
As each new person comes aboard you give them a cursory glance and a smile and wonder what role they will play in your life in the coming weeks. And woe betide anyone who makes a spectacle of themselves.
We still recall the unseemly online clamour from viewers for Ruby Tudoh to be thrown under the wheels of the bus after giving Paul Hollywood her best “come to bake bread” eyes in an early episode last year.
So it was no surprise to see five of the six female contestants fix their gaze firmly on the task at hand as this year’s competition got underway on Wednesday.
The one who didn’t was wild-eyed Claire, who marked herself out as one to avoid sitting near on the bus by producing the first tears of this year’s Bake Off (I’m not good with other people’s emotions). Claire also laid claim to the first “open the oven and discover a disaster” moment and as these were separate incidents and after Paul nearly gagged tasting her Chocolately Orangey Swiss Roll it was little wonder she was also the first to be sent homey womey.
Claire was the antithesis of super cool Nancy, who took a laissez faire attitude to baking 36 miniature cakes in two-and-a-half hours.
She did raise eyebrows, however, by saying she was planning to give “Mr Hollywood a run for his money,” in the coming weeks. We’ll have no more of that, Nancy, if you ever want to log on to social media with impunity again.
While Nancy was the Star Baker, star of the show was retired merchant navy radio operator Norman from Buckie. Norman was a man of many talents, which included pottery making and gurning.
The latter he proved when he screwed his face up at the sight of a slice of his Black Forest Swiss roll. The way he looked at it I thought it was something his dog, Lucy had produced.
“I’ve been aware of Mary Berry for a long time so I’m quite looking forward to her tasting my wares,” he told us and suddenly it hit me that I’d been looking in the wrong direction for signs of a flirtatious relationship in this year’s Bake Off tent.
The Great British Bake Off, BBC1, Wednesday.
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