SPECIAL guides to help siblings of cot death victims are set to be introduced in Scottish schools thanks to a politician who knows the trauma of losing a child.
Highland MSP David Stewart’s son Liam was a happy and healthy baby like any other when he went to sleep for the night as normal in March 1991. But when his mum Linda checked on him in the morning, the eight-month-old wasn’t breathing.
Liam was rushed to Raigmore Hospital in Inverness but there was nothing doctors could do to save him.
Cot death, also known as sudden infant death syndrome, claims the life of one infant every nine days in Scotland.
Although some factors that increase the likelihood of it occurring have been established, the exact cause is still unknown despite years of research.
Family and friends helped David and Linda through the traumatic period which followed Liam’s death but as parents to four-year-old Andrew, they faced difficult conversations.
Help came from the Scottish Cot Death Trust, founded to support bereaved families.
Last year, the charity launched a campaign to have two “bereavement books”, written sensitively for children, to be made available in schools and nurseries.
With David’s backing, the campaign is now on the brink of success as Scotland’s education bosses explore how much it will cost to publish the books and circulate them nationwide.
Labour politician David admitted that even after 25 years the painful memories were still raw.
“It was a nightmare, a horrible and distressing event that had a severe effect on our entire family,” he said. “The suddenness of that trauma never really leaves you.
“These books are excellent resources and will help families affected by the sudden death of a baby or child.
“We went through a lot of emotions, we felt horror and a dreadful sense of loss, but had a lot of help from the trust.
“Unfortunately, you have to accept that random things that are horrible and terrifying can happen and you have to deal with them as best as possible.”
One of the books, Rory’s Star, was inspired by a bereaved mum who felt there was nothing available for her two young sons when their baby brother died from cot death.
The other, called Andrew’s Rainbow, was written to support children born into a family after the death of a child. The trust says it is important these children are supported in any grief they feel towards the brother or sister they never knew.
David and Linda can relate to that, as two years after Liam’s death their daughter Kirsty was born. While it was a happy time for the family, the pair admit Liam’s death understandably made them nervous parents.
“We had to focus on Andrew’s needs and be up front with him when Liam died,” said Linda, who works as a director of European and international development at the University of the Highlands and Islands.
“That helped us get through. It’s a sad time but also a confusing time for children and it was important for Andrew and us to tell Kirsty that she had another brother who died when she was old enough.
“Liam will always be part of the family, we still talk about him, look at pictures and share memories.
“We have three children but sadly one is no longer with us.
“It’s difficult for other families who haven’t been through it to understand, the easiest thing to do is to pretend it didn’t happen after a respectable number of years.
“More awareness from these bereavement books going into schools can only be a good thing.”
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