“I REFUSE to grow up.”
So says the sticker on the side of Yvonne Caie’s computer in her office at Robin House.
And when you meet the 53-year-old deputy head of care at the hospice, her energy and infectious laugh certainly give the impression of someone who, while perhaps not quite refusing to grow up, is certainly inspired by being surrounded by children.
For Yvonne, from Dumbarton, her path in life was never in doubt.
“I always wanted to work with children,” she smiles. “I thought about teaching at first, but then decided to go into children’s nursing.”
A varied career took her from Edinburgh Sick Kids Hospital to posts in neo-natal care, hospices and community nursing around the UK. She was working in Glasgow’s Yorkhill Hospital Community Children’s Nursing Team when she heard about the job at Robin House back in 2004.
“This job came up and I thought ‘that’s for me!’,” says Yvonne.
“My first experience of end-of-life care for children was in hospitals and I thought it could be done better in a hospice setting.
“When I arrived Robin House was still just bricks, so on the day the doors opened it was really exciting butterflies in the stomach sort of thing.”
The first families arrived in August 2005, and that’s when the work of Robin House really began.
“We were really lucky early on in terms of the atmosphere,” recalls Yvonne. “Although it was a new building the staff put the families at ease and were welcoming and friendly. I think we got that right from the beginning.”
It’s certainly something that has come to epitomise Robin House since then. That feeling of happiness and laughter.
But of course there are difficult times as well. And it’s something the nursing staff have to be prepared for.
“When a child dies we make sure the staff are OK, working with them as well as the family,” explains Yvonne. “We have to be aware they might be fine doing it one time, but not the next time as there might be things going on in their own lives. Giving staff permission to say ‘I’m not up for that’ is very important.”
Experiencing the death of a child for the first time as a nurse is something that stays with that person for ever.
“You do remember the first time a child dies,” nods Yvonne quietly.
She pauses for a moment. “I can still see her as clear as day a wee five-year-old. I was the nurse on duty in the hospital ward and I hadn’t done that before so just had to kind of muddle through.
“The parents weren’t there that’s what sticks out in my mind. She was in hospital and they had gone home because they had other kids to look after.
“She wasn’t alone, because I was with her, but I wasn’t her mum. It was her mum she was calling for.”
Experiences such as this strengthened her determination to see things done differently. And she has found that opportunity at Robin House.
“Robin House gives an opportunity for the family to be there,” says Yvonne. “Mum, dad, granny, grandad, brothers and sisters whoever they need to be there.
“We are about the whole family, which is why the CHAS hospices are unique.
“Everything feels rushed in hospitals, because it has to be but our hospices give the families that opportunity to say goodbye in a more controlled situation.”
It must take a particular kind of person to be a CHAS nurse. But what is it that ‘certain something’?
“You need empathy, understanding of what the families are going through, enthusiasm,” explains Yvonne. “You just need to sort of ‘get it’!
“For the right person it’s a fantastic job. We have the luxury of time. We can give one to one care.
“It is hard at times, but it’s a job it’s not our grief, it is the families’. Yes, we are sad, but it’s about supporting the family, it’s not about us.
“Shedding tears is absolutely fine and normal, though. If you see a mum, it’s fine to have a cry with them.”
The nursing staff don’t wear uniforms, to keep an informal, friendly feel to the hospice. As if to emphasise this as we walk past the lounge I spot a young woman in jeans and a t-shirt crouching beside a young girl in a wheelchair, tenderly brushing her hair.
“Is that one of the mums?” I ask.
“Nope,” smiles Yvonne. “She’s a nurse.”
Before I leave I ask what memories of the last 10 years of Robin House particularly stand out.
After some thought she says: “There was one wee boy who was very poorly, at the end of life point. He wanted to see the lambs as it was Easter time. Luckily the husband of one of our charge nurses is a farmer, so she brought a lamb in.
“The lad got to feed it, which he loved. But then the lamb went to wee on floor! The nurse was quick and caught it in a bowl. Brilliant, we all thought . . . but then the lamb kicked the bowl and it went everywhere! That made his day he laughed so much.
“Another time a wee baby came here at just a day old. Mum asked if all the family could go in the hydrotherapy pool. They all got in and had lovely photos taken.
“The wee one died at five days. But they did that as a family, and got that memory.
“That’s Robin House it’s about making memories like that.”
“And if we can do that through the generosity of the readers that’s fantastic.”
And with that, she’s off with a cheerful laugh maybe not refusing to grow up, but certainly refusing to give up caring for the children and families of Robin House.
HERE’S HOW YOU CAN HELP
WE’RE sure you’ll be itching to start fund-raising.
as soon as possible and here’s how you can donate all that lovely cash!
We’ve tried to make it as easy as possible for you to give, so there are several ways to donate.
Text Text CHAS10, leave a space then enter the amount you want to give (eg CHAS10 £10) to 70070. It is important you include a £ sign.
Online Go to the Oor Hoose JustGiving page at
campaign.justgiving.com/charity/chas/oorhoose
or give via www.chas.org.uk
Cheque Send cheques payable to Children’s Hospice Association Scotland (CHAS) to: Oor Hoose, CHAS 10, 2nd Floor, Buchanan Tower, Cumbernauld Road, Stepps, G33 6HZ.
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