Could the Queen be a 2nd class great granny?

It’s a truth I find hard to admit but there’s a pecking order when it comes to being a granny.

If it’s your who daughter is about to give birth, then you’re right up there as the No.1 gran. When it’s your daughter-in-law who is delivering, there’s a subtle demotion to second league.

The Duchess of Cambridge’s mother Carole Middleton has staked her place as the Very Important Granny. She helped furnish the nursery and is caring for Kate before she gives birth. The new mum and baby are coming to live at her home when they leave hospital too.

Could even Diana have competed with that?

Mothers of sons, although they have good relationships with their daughters-in-law, know that when she’s giving birth a girl wants her mum.

My daughter did and I enjoyed that. Maybe I’m deeply shallow but I relished being the one to hear the news first about her ante-natal appointments, to get the phone call when labour pains started and to be the first granny to hold the baby.

This month I’m a granny-in-waiting again for my youngest son’s first child and my daughter-in-law has shared the fun of the waiting game with me. We’ve gone shopping and I was invited to the baby scan which was lovely but this week the VIG arrived from French Guyana to be granny-in-residence for the birth.

Of course I’m not miffed. How could you possibly think that? But, yes, she is getting into the delivery room when it all kicks off.

She’s advising her daughter about breast feeding and taking it easy in this hot weather and getting enough rest for the big push. It’s what mothers do.

She’s busy checking that everything is in order for baby’s arrival. And she is already cooking vats of food and freezing them so her daughter won’t have to cook for weeks.

It’s lovely for both of them to have this special bonding time together. Of course it is. Mothers and daughters naturally draw close to each other when they are going through the experience of childbirth. But if you’re a mother of sons you have to learn to know your place as a second-class granny.

I’m sneaky about it. I’m friends with my three daughters-in-law. I never criticise. I make sure they know how lucky they are to have such wonderful husbands.

I smilingly accepted that their mums had the right to be first in the door at visiting time. Really was it my fault that I arrived early for visiting and got a sneak preview?

It is of course only the beginning of the granny wars.

Carole be warned. When Kate has her baby in the next few weeks this is your time as the VIG. Enjoy every moment of it. Especially as this tot has such an important great-gran.

But think of second-league-grans waiting in the wings with our running shoes on, eager to meet our new grandchildren.